Confessions of a Toronto sex worker

By Vanessa Brown

* Names have been changed to protect privacy

Meet Ruby Jeffrey. She's in her early 40s; she supports two teenage daughters, one of whom is in university; she'd talk to you for hours if you let her, with a comforting voice that would remind you of your mother's; she holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in psychology. Ruby is a Toronto sex worker.

Sexy Pole - Sexual Anxiety

I wondered how many men are affected by sexual anxiety. Do they spend the same amount of time or any time thinking about their sexual performance? I always wonder if I am a good lover, if my partner is satisfied and if I should be doing more.

Right now I'm so busy I don't feel like I have time for sex, so I know I need to do more, but I don't have time, but am I still a good girlfriend?

So I'd like to know other people's opinions, take my pole!
Victoria Gray

For men:

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40, divorced....dating?

I am in a world of trouble with this article. I know, I know objective journalism. Just do your research and write it down. I always find it so hard to do that. I usually write about what I know or have experienced in some way. Some facet of my being can connect to the story or at least empathize with it.
I'm in denial. I will never be 40, let alone over 40. Are there numbers past 40? No, not that I know of.
It is a sign of my immaturity, a sign that I have not left behind the invincible attitude.
My parents are still married, I will be married, it will not end in divorce and therefore I will never have to date after 40.
What if? Things happen, people change, people cheat, lie, steal.....die.

A quick update

Things are coming along nicely at Sexposé headquarters.

We're finalizing our layout templates, but still looking for a printer. We know we're keeping you waiting with bated breath for our stories to be posted online, but we just want to make sure they're prefect.

Look out for Aileen's exploration of pornography as education and Veronica's profile on Claire Brosseau and her year without men. Vanessa explored multicultural sex-ed and Vicki took a close look at prophylactics in the lesbian community.

Right now, Veronica and Vanessa have something for the boys, with stories on manscaping and locker-room talk. Aileen asks how can the married couple spice up their sex life, while Vicki explores online dating for the divorcee.

Stay tuned for more!

When abstinence is the right decision

Reading Claire's blog, I was struck by the similarities between me and her.

"I'm boy-crazy too!"

"I've made questionable decisions!"

I'll run into a friend and they'll ask me, 'how's it goin' with that guy?'

And more often than not, I reply, 'which one? Oh, that was like... three or four dudes ago. Get with the program.'