Saturday, October 30, 2010

What do kids really know about sex?

The last time I had sexual-education was in grade 9. The curriculum I had was the very same one that students use today. Incidentally, it was the first year the curriculum had been applied enmasse. 1999.


But what do I really remember from health and sex-ed?
DON'T DO DRUGS
WEAR A CONDOM
DON'T HAVE SEX
DRUGS ARE BAD
SEX IS GOING TO HURT
DON'T GET PREGNANT
SEX IS GOING TO HURT REAL-BAD
DON'T HAVE AN ABORTION
THE ONLY SAFE-SEX IS NO SEX
DON'T USE THE PULL OUT METHOD OR YOU'LL GET PREGNANT
DON'T USE THE RHYTHM METHOD OR YOU'LL GET PREGNANT
YOU CAN GET PREGNANT THE FIRST TIME YOU HAVE SEX
YOU CAN GET PREGNANT IF YOU'RE ON YOUR PERIOD 
DON'T DRINK ALCOHOL. EVEN ALCOHOL IS BAD

 
I think there were some conflicting messages.

But what do kids know today?
After completing the sex-ed story, I attended a family dinner and was privileged to walk into a discussion amongst my cousins, KD Grade 9, CM Grade 6, CA Grade 5 and BM Grade 1
Bear in mind, these children have been raised in the sheltered, prudish, Catholic tradition that produced me. 

CM: I heard they make those bracelets (silly bandz) out of condoms.

KD: That's just an urban legend.

ME: Hey! Change the subject! There are 6 year-old ears present.

CM: (Ignores me) Although, I never heard about any sort of condom in colours like that.

ME: (giggles silently) HEY, what did I just say?! This is not an appropriate conversation to have in front of your 6-year-old cousin.

CA: The only condom I know is con-dom-inium

BM: I don't know what you guys are talking about and I don't care.

Later...

ME: Wait a minute. Did they teach you what a condom is in school?

CM: No.

ME: Did your parents teach you?

CM: No.

ME: Do your parents know you know what a condom is?

CM: No.

KD: I know what it is! I learned it in school!

ME: Yes, well, you're in Grade 9. You're supposed to know this already. But they don't teach condoms to Grade 6's.

CM: We found a condom behind the school, tied to a fence. I didn't know what it was but some of the other kids taught me.

So, great. He's much too young to learn about masturbation, but he knows what a condom is and what it does. I'm glad his entire knowledge-base on condoms has come from a bunch of 11 and 12 year-old boys.

I'm sure they were informative. And I'm sure that CM walked away armed with knowledge about preventing STI's and pregnancy.

This is why sexual education of our children is so vital.

And this is why it needs to be taught by a professional.

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