Lesbians and Safe Sex

I'm a lesbian, nice to meet you.

It's always awkward to put that out there and I wouldn't if it wasn't a large part of this experiment.

Let me explain from the beginning.

When I was asked if I wanted to help develop a magazine about sex I thought I should because my sexuality, my experience and my contacts would diversify the magazine. I didn't think about how deep I would have to delve into my own sexuality, until I started to do research this story.

I always hear about using condoms. Make sure you use a condom, make sure you don't get pregnant. I'm not going to get pregnant, so why bother with a condom?

I could get diseases, yes, but I won’t.

It was my fellow editor Veronica Blake who asked me why I didn't think I would be afflicted with an STI.

I said what a lot of people say. "I know who I'm sleeping with."

Veronica pushed and asked who my partners had slept with, did I know them? Did I know they were STI free?

I didn't.

I have never used protection and had never been tested.

I started talking to my lesbian friends and acquaintances about protection. Some had been tested, one had used a dental dam, one had used condoms on sex toys but, there were quite a few who, like me had never protected themselves or been tested.

However, the dental dam was used because it was flavoured and the couple thought it might be fun, they found it wasn't fun and stopped using it before the act was finished.

Another who used condoms on sex toys admitted that she didn't use them all the time.

I wondered why I had never used protect and realised I knew very little about the forms of protection available. Dental Dams ...latex gloves? What else?

I asked my partner what she thought of protection and she thought that putting that barrier between herself and her lover made sex less intimate.

So I decided that in order to understand this story I had to get tested, ask a doctor about my options, and I had to use protection.

Tomorrow I have an appointment at the Hassle Free Clinic to get tested.

Victoria Gray